Jokes

Subject: Re: Jokes Sun May 06, 2007 6:34 pm

hahah funny

Subject: Re: Jokes Sun May 20, 2007 3:50 pm

Husband Wanted (Good one)

A lonely widow, aged 70, decided that it was time to get married again.
She put an ad in the local newspaper that read:

HUSBAND WANTED: MUST BE IN MY AGE GROUP (70's) MUST NOT BEAT ME, MUST
NOT
RUN AROUND ON ME AND MUST STILL BE GOOD IN BED! ALL APPLICANTS PLEASE
APPLY IN PERSON.

On the second day she heard the doorbell. Much to her dismay, she
opened
the door to see a gray-haired gentleman sitting in a wheelchair. He
had
no arms or legs.

"You're not really asking me to consider you, are you?" The widow
said.
"Just look at you .. You have no legs!"

The old gentleman smiled, "Therefore, I cannot run around on you!"

"You don't have any arms either!" She snorted.

Again, the old man smiled, "Therefore, I can never beat you!"

She raised an eyebrow and asked intently, "Are you still good in bed?"

The old man leaned back, beamed a big smile and said, "I rang the
doorbell, didn't I?"

The wedding is scheduled for Saturday.

Subject: Re: Jokes Mon May 21, 2007 1:57 pm

hahahha so funny good one lol

Subject: Re: Jokes Mon May 21, 2007 2:20 pm

yup lolz..

Subject: Re: Jokes Mon May 21, 2007 9:29 pm

jus how long...... uhhh never mind Smile

neva mind at all Smile

Subject: Re: Jokes Mon May 21, 2007 9:54 pm

angel_gurl wrote:: jus how long...... uhhh never mind neva mind at all

haha he reached the door bell didn't he lol

Subject: Re: Jokes Tue May 22, 2007 1:20 pm

lolz.....yes he did..so he's good in bed lolz...

Subject: Re: Jokes Thu May 24, 2007 11:52 am

What do a lawyer and a sperm have in common?

What do a lawyer and a sperm have in common?
They both hope to be human someday.

Subject: Re: Jokes Thu May 24, 2007 12:00 pm

Natalie the Ho

A well-dressed man holding a brief case walks into a ho house, and asks the madam for Natalie.
The madam tells him that Natalie is the most popular of all the girls there, and that she charges 1000 dollar a night. The man reached into his brief case, pulls out ten fresh Ben Franklins (100 dollar bills) and hands them to the madam.
Natalie came down to greet him, and off they went to her room for fun.
The next night, the same guy goes to the ***** house again, and asks for Natalie. The Madam tells him the same price to which he obliges.
The next night, the man comes in and asks for Natalie again. As he gets to the room, Natalie is very impressed with the man, and says,
"No one has ever asked for me three nights in a row. Where are you from?"

"Philadelphia"
"No kidding? I'm also from Philly. Whatcha do for a living?"
"I know where you're from, I'm a lawyer. Your father passed away, and I have been asked to give you this 3000 dollars from his will."
Which just goes to show that you always get f**ked by lawyers!

Subject: Re: Jokes Thu May 24, 2007 2:15 pm

hahahaa...lolz...

Natalie..tsk tsk tsk....

Subject: Re: Jokes Fri May 25, 2007 9:56 pm

LoL I like that one 2

Subject: Re: Jokes Sat May 26, 2007 12:09 pm

lol poor natilie. lawyer was smart doe did huis job and had some overtime. lol

areefa that old man was one talented man. his wife must be very happy

Subject: Re: Jokes Sat May 26, 2007 3:34 pm

Totally lol

Subject: Re: Jokes Sat May 26, 2007 6:27 pm

hahaha...lolz.

Subject: Re: Jokes Sun May 27, 2007 7:33 pm

Seven year old Susie approached her mother one morning and asked, "Mommie how old are you?" To which her mother responded, "Now Susie, that is not a question you should ask a woman."
Susie then replied, "Well, how much do you weigh?" Once again her mother said, "Susie that is another question you never ask a woman."
Perplexed, Susie was sitting on the steps when her best friend eight year old Anna came by. "Why so sad?" Anna asked. Susie replied, "I asked my mother how old she was, and how much she weighed, but she wouldn't tell me."
Immediately, the ever worldly Anna put her hands on her hips, lilted to one side and advised Susie to get her mother's drivers license out of her purse and she could get all the answers.
Triumphantly, Susie marched into the kitchen where her mother was preparing dinner and announced, "I saw your driver's license, and know you are 35 years old." She continued with, "And I know you weigh 135 pounds."
Susie's mother sighed and admitted to her age and weight.
Finally Susie exclaimed, "And...I know why you and Daddy got a divorce." Puzzled by this remark her mother asked, "How do you know this?"

Susie waved the license in the air, and replied:

"It says right here you got an "F" in sex!!"

Subject: Re: Jokes Sun May 27, 2007 8:11 pm

lol lord the woman flunk sex so she get divorced. lol my my my lol!

lol tht was funny

Subject: Re: Jokes Sun May 27, 2007 9:48 pm

lol funny

Subject: Re: Jokes Mon May 28, 2007 1:33 pm

lolzz..."F" in sex...lolzz..poor lady...aww poor man.

Subject: Re: Jokes Mon May 28, 2007 2:34 pm

poor man is rite!! man gettin mediocore wuk. lol well i guess them cud always send she summa school. Smile

i mean i sure she naw want to flunk again

Subject: Re: Jokes Mon May 28, 2007 2:40 pm

lolzz...
She could have come by me..I could teach her.

Subject: Re: Jokes Thu May 31, 2007 12:13 am

lol man wat a lesson can i come??

Subject: Re: Jokes Thu May 31, 2007 12:36 pm

eh eh Bev turn teacher n suh

Subject: Re: Jokes Thu May 31, 2007 12:45 pm

Sounds Painful

A young man once made a trip out to china where he had sex with many women. When he came back to America he noticied that his "equipment" had turned green and shot out flames.

So he went to the doctor to find out what the problem was.

After explaining his problem the doctor said so your "piece" is green and it burns to urinate?" The guy replies "no i have a regular flame thrower."

The doctor then examines him and finds out that this is true. He then shakes his head and says "we are going to have to amputate." The guy refuses and decides to go to a chinese doctor for a second opinion, and after explaining his situation the chinese doctor laughs and says "no those american doctors are so cheap they just want your money, we no need amputate."

The guy is so happy. "Really?" The chinese guy looks at him and says "NO you wait few month it fall off by itself."

Subject: Re: Jokes Thu May 31, 2007 4:03 pm

lolzz..Candy...no fee required for u...lol.

hahahhaa...Areefa.

Subject: Re: Jokes Thu May 31, 2007 5:53 pm

hahah lord poor dude. lol see wa happen wen u like sling it ( i quotin my fren)

lol BEv fa free?!?! lol lawd i comin tell me wen and where lol