Jokes

Subject: Re: Jokes Thu May 31, 2007 6:06 pm

lolzzz...hell...midnight!!!

Subject: Re: Jokes Thu May 31, 2007 6:21 pm

dammmmmm gyal me cant mek it. me naw get no ride

Subject: Re: Jokes Thu May 31, 2007 6:27 pm

hehehe...arite come any time man..I'm always available for u.

Subject: Re: Jokes Thu May 31, 2007 8:08 pm

ohhhh la la u givin me ideas lol j/k

Subject: Re: Jokes Thu May 31, 2007 10:18 pm

eh eh ayo 2 get a room lol

Subject: Re: Jokes Fri Jun 01, 2007 1:07 am

lol only if u comin

Subject: Re: Jokes Fri Jun 01, 2007 1:36 pm

now yall talking...3 sum.

We need a king size bed!

Subject: Re: Jokes Fri Jun 01, 2007 10:10 pm

woo party on

Subject: Re: Jokes Sat Jun 02, 2007 9:35 pm

bring the rum!!! lol

Subject: Re: Jokes Sat Jun 02, 2007 11:47 pm

lolz...all da we got.

Subject: Re: Jokes Sun Jun 03, 2007 5:45 pm

woooo watcha party!!lol

Subject: Re: Jokes Mon Jun 04, 2007 9:42 pm

a woman decided to visit her son unexpectedly, when she opens the door she is shocked to see a woman lying naked on the sofa:
mom:what are u doin here?
woman:i'm gonna be ur new daughter-in-law
mom:so then why are u naked here
woman:i'm not naked i'm wearing my love dress ur son likes it when i have this on, it really excites him.
So she then left her son's house n went home,got naked and lay on her bed awaiting her husband.
he then walks in and ask what she doin there
"i'm wearing my love dress for you hunnie" she said
he then replied " oh in that case it needs some ironing."

Subject: Re: Jokes Mon Jun 04, 2007 10:18 pm

lolz.z.I read that in the newpapers Yesterday! Lolz..so funny.

Subject: Re: Jokes Tue Jun 05, 2007 9:59 am

An atheist was taking a walk through the woods.

"What majestic trees! What powerful rivers! What beautiful animals!" "science is so great", he said to himself.

As he continued walking alongside the river he heard a rustling in the bushes.

Turning to look, he saw a 7 foot grizzly charging towards him.

He ran as fast as he could up the path. Looking over his shoulder he saw that the bear was closing in on him. His heart was pumping frantically and he tried to run even faster.

He tripped and fell on the ground. He rolled over to pick himself up but saw the bear raising his paw to take a swipe at him. At that instant the atheist cried out: "Oh my God..."

Time stopped. The bear froze. The forest was silent.

It was then that a bright light shone upon the man and a voice came out of the sky saying: "You deny my existence for all of these years, teach others I don't exist, and even credit creation to a cosmic accident. Do you expect me to help you out of this predicament? Am I to count you as a believer?"

The atheist looked directly into the light, "It would be hypocritical of me to suddenly ask you to treat me as a Christian now, but perhaps, could you make the BEAR a Christian?"

"Very well," said the voice.

The light went out. And the sounds of the forest resumed. And then the bear lowered his paw, bowed his head and spoke:
"Lord, bless this food which I am about to receive and for which I am truly thankful. Amen"

Subject: Re: Jokes Tue Jun 05, 2007 2:02 pm

lolz.....I felt sorry for him..but what the heck..the bear turned a christian..prayed and had food. Lolz.

Subject: Re: Jokes Tue Jun 05, 2007 7:27 pm

yep one more added to the kingdom huh? lol poor guy lol

Subject: Re: Jokes Tue Jun 05, 2007 8:14 pm

lolzz...awww

Subject: Re: Jokes Thu Jun 07, 2007 10:32 pm

A family in Guyana was puzzled when the coffin of their dead
mother arrived from the USA, sent by their sister. The tiny corpse
was so tightly squeezed inside the large coffin that their mother's
face was practically touching the glass cover. When they opened the coffin, they found a letter from their sister pinned to their mother's chest, which read:

Dearest Brother and Sisters,

I am sending you our mother's remains for the funeral there.
Sorry I could not come along, as the expenses were so high.

You will find inside the coffin, under Mammy's body, 12 cans
of Bumble Bee Tuna, 12 box spagetti, 12 Vaseline Intensive Care Skin Lotion, 12 Colgate Toothpaste, four 5 pound bag Canadian imported flour, and 12 ice apple. Just divide it among yourselves.

On Mammy's feet is a brand-new pair of Reeboks (Size for
Papi. There are four pairs of Reeboks under Mammy's head for Bayo's sons.

Mammy is wearing six Ralph Lauren T-shirts, one for Chun's
husband and the rest are for my nephews. Mek sure Stella sweet man don't get none.

Mammy is also wearing one dozen Wonder Bras (your favorite), all different size. I don't think any gun fit Pauline; she bubby too big.

The 2 dozen Victoria Secrets panties that Mammy is wearing should be distributed among my nieces and cousins. Don't give Pauline big-battie daughter any of the thongs. Ah gun send hanes when Jaitoon brother in law coming down fuh de races.

Mammy is also wearing eight Docker pants. One each for Neville sons; give one to Poowah, she said she likes how they fit.

The Swiss watch Chubby asked for is on Mammy's left wrist. Mek sure you careful with it; it real.

Your loving sister

Nazie

PS : Please buy Mammy wan dress to wear for the funeral.

Subject: Re: Jokes Thu Jun 07, 2007 10:54 pm

lolzz...darn...lolzz....

She's cruel though..she didn't buy the poor late old lady a dress to wear for the funeral...tsk tsk tsk...

Subject: Re: Jokes Thu Jun 07, 2007 10:58 pm

LOL I luv this joke lol

Subject: Re: Jokes Thu Jun 07, 2007 11:01 pm

I wonder if she send anything for me?

Subject: Re: Jokes Thu Jun 07, 2007 11:05 pm

LOL gal nah wear nuttin wa come from da dead lady coffin

Subject: Re: Jokes Thu Jun 07, 2007 11:10 pm

lolzz...I'd never! lolzz...

Subject: Re: Jokes Fri Jun 08, 2007 11:34 am

Subject: Re: Jokes Fri Jun 08, 2007 3:40 pm

lol bev man jus be thankful u aint pauline big battie dawta. lol

funny